Are you a young, hot college girl who thinks you deserve to get paid for being young and hot without having to dance or date an older man? Do you want to have lots of kids in theory, but do not want the stretch lines and sagginess of women in their thirties? If college debt and that freeloading, pickup truck-driving boy toy of yours have strained your student loans, then there is a good job for you, and all you have to do is lie on your back and relax.


I'm not talking about answering a Craigslist ad for “modeling” or becoming a supermodel because you met a rich guy who runs beauty pageants. Or even having to marry a rich guy. Nope, this is the life of an anonymous egg donor. If you're smart, pretty, and athletic, then you're looking at a paycheck of up to $27,000 locally. You have to be between 21 and 29 years old, so you better get in to check it out before you become an old maid.




For one day of work, you can make as much money as you might make in a year toiling at your first job out of college. Pay off the education or spend the summer in Europe. Buy your man some new rims. Whatever.

Go Pro

Like a chicken, you can keep producing eggs. That means you can travel to exotic locations like NYC, LA, or Dayton and sell even more. The more you donate, the more money you can get, and then you could even invest it in things such as rhinoplasty or other enhancements that will make your eggs even more desirable. And when the time comes to settle down, you'll have your new parts to help land you the best looking lawyer in the firm.


Body of Work

Unlike being a surrogate or having a baby to sell to the highest bidder (if that's a thing), donating your eggs won't make you turn into an extra-large and hormonal version of yourself. You can't exactly show up for Chemistry class in a giant maternity outfit and expect people to not notice, and it's hard to hang out with your bffs at the frat party when you can't have some wapatui.

But it's not just your changing body during pregnancy that's an issue. Even relatively young women (21 to 29) end up with postpartum concerns, like depression, change in eyesight, lady parts issues, stretch marks, scars, varicose veins, and all kinds of new problem areas for weight control. That stuff sucks even when it's your own kids, but no one's going to feel sorry for you when you got paid for the service. Let them stick your fertilized eggs in some other naive college girl who didn't score a 30 on her ACTs.




There are some potential disadvantages to selling your eggs, particularly if you don't really want to be reminded of your dirty little secret years from now when you've got your own kids to raise. DNA tests will link you to all your kids, and people love them some DNA tests. Even if your files are sealed and whatnot, if your sister or dad get a DNA test done for family history purposes, suddenly an 18-year-old from Dayton, Ohio, might end up at your front door looking to be reunited with his real mom. And if you sold dozens of eggs, your life might someday become like a bad Adam Sandler movie.


Worse, it could be like a storyline in Passions (the soap opera) when your daughter brings home a guy who's a few years her senior and who has your eyes. Sure, you don't want your purchased offspring beating down your door to find their real mom, but we are attracted to people who remind us of ourselves, so if you donate a couple dozen eggs to local parents a few years before you start making your own babies, you might want to keep an eye on those kids. Most states don't require blood tests, let alone DNA tests before marriage, and no one controls who you crush on at the mall. So you better keep tabs on ALL your kids so you don't end up with grandchildren with fused limbs.

God’s Plan

Morally, you might have a problem with donating your eggs, either now or in the distant future (when you're married to someone who wants to make America great again, again). Even if the decision to hawk your eggs isn't seen as morally deficient, your friends will get catty about it. Partially because that's what girls between 21 and 29 do when another young woman has something that the others desire, like the quarterback at the community college. Or a sugar daddy’s old Mercedes AMG. Or not having cankles. We're all mean girls sometimes, and I'm not even a girl. Anyhow, if you sell your reproductive goods because you are pretty and smart, you will elicit snickering from your gal pals. And your grandma.


Bottom Line

If I was a pretty, intelligent woman between 21 and 29 in need of some cash, this is way better than just about any alternative that uses the good looks as an important factor. Leave those other jobs for the girls who are pretty and not as smart. That said, like most jobs for hot young women, this one is in the reproductive industry. And that's a messy field to be in. If you're away at college in some God-forsaken town like Beloit, WI, and you're never coming back, it's got to be a tempting part-time gig, as long as you keep it on the down low. And use your imagination to handle all potential problems for the next 80 years of your life, it's likely the best money you'll get for selling something that's grown inside you, short of selling a kidney for $200,000. It beats blood plasma and hair by a lot. Then again, no one's going to make real human babies out of those other items without first figuring out how to successfully and illegally clone humans. (At least I hope it's illegal.) But selling your eggs is probably as legal as selling your time to lonely businessmen in town for an insurance convention. And probably a better time, especially if he's super old, like over 40, and wants to talk politics.